Home > Christianity, Faith > How To Feel Great About Saying No

How To Feel Great About Saying No

Have you ever been asked to do something?  I know that the answer to this is yes.  You have been asked to do many things in your life.  What was your answer?

Sometimes it has been yes.  Those are easy.  Someone asks you to do something.  Boom.  Yes, you are glad to do it.

The trickier part is when you want to say no.  As Jon Acuff mentioned in this post, we begin to make excuses and justifying why we are saying no.

What we aren’t doing is letting our Yes be Yes and our No be No.

Why do we do that?  It’s because we don’t want to feel bad.  We don’t want to seem like a bad guy.  We don’t want to be a jerk.

However, I think there is another reason.

I think it’s because we haven’t defined ourselves.  We haven’t set our values.  We haven’t determined what we believe.

Spend some time with yourself.  Decide what you believe.  Determine the values that are most important to you.  Write them down.  Review them daily.  Burn them into your heart, mind and soul.

When we do those things, it’s much easier for us when the time to say no comes.

Someone asks you to do something that conflicts with your well thought out value?  It’s easy to say no.

Someone asks you to do something good, but your value leads you toward something better?  No.

Someone asks you to do something that you don’t feel fits the ministry path the Lord has set you on?  No.

Will you run into the occasion that you have to say Yes to something you want to say No to?  Absolutely.  It will happen.

But more often, you will not find yourself in situations that conflict with what you believe and who you really are.

Do you have a hard time saying no?

Categories: Christianity, Faith Tags: ,
  1. November 4, 2012 at 6:27 am

    I am like some people who have trouble turning someone away by saying no. I have devoted my life being there when then need is there and have always been happy to lend a helping hand when asked.

    My problem is when I ask for a little hand, I find it hard to find someone who will step forward and offer. The difference in the culture I was raised in and the culture I live with is amazing. Some peopel have no problem turning their back to you and just walking away. It is hard to understand, but I still manage to do what I can.


  2. Faye
    November 4, 2012 at 6:49 am

    Only when I’m breathing.

    Seriously, this is great advice, and I’m on that journey. It’s tough though when others in ministry choose to not understand your boundaries and try to tell you you’re wrong for not saying yes.

  3. November 4, 2012 at 7:52 am

    Yes (I meant to say no, but I just couldn’t get it out)!

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