Home > Christianity, Faith > The Calculated Hesitancy Of Finding A Church

The Calculated Hesitancy Of Finding A Church

If you are a long time read of Deuceology, you will remember that at this point last year I was writing a series called Church Search.  We  visited several churches during November and December of 2011, before finding a church at the beginning of 2012.  Eventually, we joined that church.

Alas, it did not work out.

Though nothing bad happened, it simply was not a church where we could remain.  Circumstances prevented us from becoming involved the way we really want to be involved in a church.

So, with some gnashing of teeth, we began pulling away from that church, wondering exactly what we would do for “church”.

Then came an invitation to attend a church where we know several people and is closer to the community we live in.  We have gone there now for the last month and have enjoyed it.


We are proceeding with a calculated hesitancy.  We don’t want to base anything simply on the wonderful emotions we have experienced.

We have been welcomed.  We have been happy.  We have felt at ease.  We have been comfortable and felt safe.  All of that is important.

But after what we have been through since August 2011, we are purposely taking it slow.  We are sticking our toes in the water first before we stick our feet in and well before we jump in completely.

Our hesitancy is calculated in finding a new church.

Have you ever experienced calculated hesitancy in finding a new church?

Categories: Christianity, Faith Tags: ,
  1. November 19, 2012 at 4:41 am

    Yes, even as a pastor. 🙂 I took one church because I “had” to (read I had one month left of pay). That was one of the worst mistakes of my life, although God was able to make something good come out of it. Take your time. You don’t have to “join” to feel a part of something. But I am glad you are pursuing it.

  2. November 19, 2012 at 6:18 am

    I can’t help but notice, you mentioned everything except feeling the presence and workings of God. I guess it all depends on what you are looking for in a church family, for you are the church as Jesus resides in your heart and you go to a building for fellowship with your church family.
    When God is working within the church you feel His presence when you enter the building. You see it in how people greet and welcome you and hear it in the messages God gives the pastor to share with you. You don’t mention any of these.
    Peace be with your heart as you find a new church family.


    • November 19, 2012 at 11:37 am

      Ed, I find that difficult to describe. Was it there? Yes. But I don’t really know what to say. Was it in the music, but I don’t know how to convey that. What I can tell you that this is one of the few churches that I have been to where I think many people are driven by Jesus to take their gifts and talents and glorify Him.

      • November 19, 2012 at 7:04 pm

        When I first walked into the church we go to I felt a peace come over me that I had never felt before. When we entered the sanctuary we were greeted by several people who made us feel welcome and wanted. When the minister gave the message I could almost feel the presence of God sitting right next to me.
        That was almost 7 years ago and the feeling is the same every week. I sing in the choir and we are both active in the church. Our bible study class ( sunday school) is very friendly and active both inside and outside the church.
        This is the feeling I am talking about and how I explain them. Maybe this is what you are looking for. If you ever come visit east Texas stop by Crossroads Baptist Church just outside Marshall. I will be looking for you.


      • November 19, 2012 at 8:33 pm

        Realize too, Ed, that I may be purposely downplaying some of it on my blog. I may not want to display everything that I felt or have been feeling. I may not want things to seem too good to be true.

      • November 19, 2012 at 10:09 pm

        I’m sorry, but I cannot imagine anything God does as being too good to be true. I share these feelings for His glory and I think that is what we, as Christians, should be doing.
        We are truly blessed on a daily basis and our one mission in life is to share these blessings for His glory to help lead others to Him.

        Peace be with you!


      • November 20, 2012 at 5:15 am

        Ed, I would agree with that. Don’t misunderstand that. But, what I hope you will understand what I have experienced. I was in basically a dead church for nearly a decade. Then, for a brief time, we went to a church that on the surface seemed great, but had several underlying issues that I missed on the front end. Now, I walk into a church that I see doing exactly what I have always thought the Church/ a church should do. I’m cautious and hesitant, wondering if it’s real. I believe it is, but there are emotional issues that the Lord will have to help me overcome. And He will. I’m confident of that.

  3. November 19, 2012 at 7:47 am

    We took our time while looking for a church while I was in seminary. We visited sometimes 2 churches a week and would visit them a minimum of two times before we made a decision.

    • November 19, 2012 at 11:39 am

      Rob, we have been going for about 5 weeks now. We tried Wednesday night where we eat and go straight to Bible study. Last night was a Thanksgiving dinner. Soon we will try a small group. There are a lot of other things I will write about.

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